Sr. M. Pauline Angermayr

Sr. M. Pauline Angermayr

For the first time at 15 years old I got to know nuns up close. At that time I was in the habit of reading a small section of the gospel every day. One day -it was June 4, 1984 - I read the gospel according to Luke 9:23-26: "Then He said to them all: “Whoever wants to be My disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow Me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for Me will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit their very self? Whoever is ashamed of Me and My words, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when He comes."

After I read this section, I went out into nature. There it was again, as if a voice reaffirmed this section word for word absolutely clearly. I understood this as a call from Jesus to follow HIM as a nun. But I did not tell anyone about it at first. At 17 I crossed paths again with nuns. I got a job in the kitchen of a cure resort which was run by nuns. I was soon connected in a deep friendship with the sisters of the resort. Many spiritual discussions deepened my faith.

Deep in my heart I felt the call of Jesus: "Consecrate your life completely to Me and become a nun. “ The urge in me was very strong, but I their Franciscan spirituality did not feel exactly right for me.

One day I "coincidentally" met Sr. Leonie of the Sisters of Mary of Mount Carmel. She invited me to a retreat at the motherhouse in Linz, which was arranged by their sisters. Through many further encounters I got to know the sisters and their spirituality better. Carmelite spirituality fit well with the inner path I had traveled up until then. I loved to spend time in the silence before the tabernacle, I felt an urge to stay connected with Jesus throughout the day, and I wanted to serve God and other people in my daily work.

Above all I searched for Jesus inside myself. Thus I finally followed my heart and in1989 at 21 years of age joined the Sisters of Mary of Mount Carmel. With great gratitude I can look back on 20 years in the monastery. Life with Jesus is beautiful. His presence always is with me always, in good and bad times.

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